i never realized how many flaws i had before heather.
it's the fact that she actually speaks her mind and tells me when i'm in the wrong that makes her different, VASTLY different, from every other girlfriend i've ever had.
maybe it hurts in the short run to know that i've always had this problem, but in the long run it'll be better for everyone, mostly because the biggest problem i have has damaged almost every relationship i've ever had and i never even knew it.
i found that my biggest problem is that i have a superiority complex.
i always have to be right, ALWAYS. even with information that i barely know anything about.
even those of you who read my xanga from time to time probably noticed this, because it's infiltrated every facet of my life.
i feel extremely humiliated when i'm wrong. i think it has something to do with the whole macho thing. i want to be right because being wrong means that... well, i'm wrong!
and the thing is, i'm wrong a lot but refuse to admit it. it's caused a lot of fights between heather and myself, and i hate when we fight, especially when it's because of me.
i dunno. i try to fight it but it always reasserts itself. my superiority complex, that is.
i don't want it to become a major stumbling block in our relationship. i want to overcome it.
i just don't know how.
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